• PowerGuy300

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    PowerGuy300 last won the day on November 6 2018

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    1. I've had a fun little writing idea kicking around in my head for a little while now and I have finally decided to put it to paper. If you need any setting details, it's would be the present day, but the Ancient Greek gods are the ones who rule (yes, a lot like Percy Jackson, but most similarities end there.) Let's just say that the Parthenon is a few gods bigger than it was four thousand years ago. Note: this may also make more sense the second read through. The stout man who answered the door was none other than Dionysus himself. His identity was given away by his unbuttoned flannel shirt, showing off his hairy beer belly. I knew him quite well, but of course, he had no idea who I was. Then again, that was expected from any typical arrogant god. He sized me up with a raise of his eyebrow and was clearly disappointed. He regarded me from behind his ratty wad of dark facial hair, “Well?” He said gruffly. I already had a long day. Why does it just have to get better and better? First, I’m cornered by a greedy pack of goblins, then I get stuck in line for four hours at the DMV, and now, I’m not allowed in Olympus. In truth, I was prepared for it. Every time I came here, I always got the same, almost challenging “well?” I would be lying if I said that it didn’t irritate me. “It's a deep subject,” I snapped back. The god shook his head in disapproval. “That was a terrible joke, kid.” For a moment, he caught my cold eyes studying him and look of puzzlement went over his face, “Do I know you…?” “No,” I replied quickly. Maybe a little too fast. “I have a business in Olympus... Whatever-your-name-is.” That made Dionysus tick. Gods hate it when they are not recognized. They feel that being more or less all-powerful means that everyone should adore them and throw roses on their feet at the sight of them. He glared at me, a snarl forming on his lip, “For your information, Sunny, it's Lord Dionysus, god-” “Of parties and wine. I know,” I said, cutting him off, “Take a joke, man. Look, I need to get through that door. I have business there.” I would rather not specify on what kind of business since telling border patrol that I'm engaging in a black market trade would be about as smart as turning myself in for my own bounty. The god scoffed, “Sorry kid, but unless you have another god's permission… no can do.” His fake apology always set me off. And every time I also managed to keep my composure. Barely. I pursed my lips in annoyance, “I am a god, so let me in.” Dionysus roared with laughter, “And I'm Don Jeanes.” He put on his best impression, “I don't drink beer much. Scratch that. I drink all the time. Stay thirsty my friends.” He exhaled his last word with force, giving me a strong waft of a spectrum of hard drinks. I almost gagged. The acrid smell could put a bloodhound in the hospital. “I'm serious, Donny. I'm not serious very often, but I am right now.” “DON'T CALL ME DONNY!” The god screamed. Dionysus immediately realized how loud he just was and he looked over his shoulder to make sure no one was around. His cheeks went bright crimson. I'll take that as a good sign that someone was. Dionysus glared down at me, “What are you the god of, anyway?” I paused, I didn't like telling anyone this bit of information, “...Humor.” I managed to say. He held out his hand flat in front of his face as if it were a sheet of paper. He ran his finger down it pretending that he was reading off names, “Here, lemme check my list of gods,” he said mockingly, “oh look! You're not on it. Nowhere from A to Z. Aphrodite to Zeus. What a shame.” I craned my neck to look at the invisible piece of paper represented by his hand. I reached over and pointed at the big knuckle on his ring finger, “Yes I am. See?” Dionysus actually took the bait. He looked down at the spot on his hand as if there was a drop of wine on it that he had missed licking. I flicked my wrist upward, my fingertips grazing the tip of his nose. A chuckle escaped my lips. That was too easy. This set Dionysus off even more, “If you pull one more fast one on me, I'll turn you into a giant grape before you can even say ‘oh grape.’ If I didn’t have a job to do, a dozen Oompa Loompas would already be rolling you down a hallway right now.” I sighed. I didn't need to push him more than I already had. “Fine.” “Now, what's your name, boy?” Dionysus asked. I would hardly count a couple of millennia-old as “boy.” “John, the god of humor,” I replied with a tinge of sass in my voice. and other things. I thought. Dionysus frowned, “Let's say that you are some minor god-” “God.” I corrected. I hated when people called me that. “There is no such thing as a minor god. Either you're a god, or you're not.” “Then what about demigods?” “That's beside the point. Donn- Dionysus.” The god’s gaze hardened, “I'm going to act like you didn't say that. I know for a fact that you can't be a god, and you don't have permission from one to get into Olympus. So get out of here before I smite you down where you stand!” I didn't tell him, but I knew he was bluffing. Only Zeus could smite people. “You said that you know that I'm not a god,” I inquired, “but what evidence do you have against it?” “For a start your name is John. What god would be named John? That sounds way to casual.” An idea sprang into my mind. I was in a bit of a hurry. But what are ten minutes after four millennia? “It's a long story, but I got some time to tell you all about it... if you do too.” To sweeten the deal I swung my bottomless pack off of my shoulder, yanked open the top, and withdrew a yellow pitcher. There was a sticky note plastered to the side that read “hard ambrosia - homebrew.” Dionysus's hostility stopped immediately. He eyed the jug greedily, silently debating with himself on whether or not it was a trap. I took a good whiff of the golden drink and sighed with satisfaction. Eventually, his gluttony got the better of him. “Oh... what the heck. We haven't had a security breach in over a millennium. What could possibly go wrong with a defenseless minor god? You talked me into, Johnny.” I rolled my eyes, he had no idea how wrong he was. “If you call me Johnny, then I'm calling you Donny.” The god grinned, showing off his rotten teeth. “Fair enough.” Ten minutes later, we were sitting at a picnic table nestled under a banyan tree, drinking spiked ambrosia like we were best friends. Somehow, Dionysus was already intoxicated, but that may have been because he downed every cup I gave him in one gulp. He hiccuped, “So, you're telling me the gods named you John as a joke?” his words were starting to slur together. He drained another glass and slammed it back on the table, signifying he was done and he wanted another cup. I stopped counting how many drinks he had at thirteen. I took the pitcher and poured him another drink, “That's right, my friend. I've been joking ever since day one.” For some reason, Dionysus found this hilarious. He clutched his stomach and wheezed with laughter. He sounds like a seal, I thought, mildly disturbed. After downing yet another cup of the godly drink, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and belched loudly. “So, Johnny, you're the god of humor, right? Why don't you tell me a good one?” This was the moment I had been waiting for. I gave him a half smile, “Are you sure? It's not the best.” The god waved his hand dismissively, “Go for it. I'm all ears.” I held up my pointer finger to ask for a moment of his patience, “Okay… this one is pretty bad. Like as bad as Trafficus, the god of traffic and stop lights… on a bad day.” Dionysus sniggered, snot dribbling out of a nostril, “C'mon, tell me! Tell me!” He hiccuped again. My fake half smile was replaced with a perfectly real malicious one. “No need, I just got you to laugh at my joke.” Dionysus looked confused, “Right… but there has to be more to it than that?” I shrugged, my teeth still shining, “There was. But you laughed.” The god’s face was blank. “You still don't get it to don't you? Let's just say that I found a loophole in the god system. Lemme explain. The ocean is Poseidon's domain just like how jokes are my domain. I make the rules of my domain. Since you are now fully immersed in my domain, you also fully follow my rules.” It was around this moment when Dionysus became aware that I could command him to do anything now and qualify it as changing the rules. His confuddled grin faded away. Despite his drunkenness, he grew very solemn, “Are trying to take advantage of me, boy?” I clasped my hands together in mock prayer, “Finally! A breakthrough!” A flash of realization came upon him, “But… you… you can't!” I leaned forward in my seat until I was a few inches away from his face until I could see every last gnat hopping around in his Duck Dynasty beard. “Why not?” He seemed to be at a loss for words, “Because… I outrank you in godly strength!” He said triumphantly. I sighed. Did this numbskull know anything? I pressed my thumb and forefinger over the bridge of my nose, “Donny, you know how whenever a mortal prays, worships, sacrifices, or blesses you, you gain a little extra power temporarily, hmm?” Dionysus nodded dumbly. He still not fully aware. “And you remember how the gods named me John as a joke?” He nodded again. My face lit up, “Great! Then I bet you also figured that was their biggest mistake.” I patted him on the shoulder. The god's face contorted in a mix of confusion and curiosity. He didn't comment, so I continued, “John is a pretty common name among the human race these days. There isn't a second where some person from whatever religion isn't praying for a random John right now. You see where I'm going with this, right?” No matter how many times I went over my master plan, the look of shock and horror on whichever god's face was always priceless. Dionysus was sinking down into his chair like the Titanic. He had around the same ratios as the vessel too. I let the tension rise for a moment more before I broke the deafening silence with a “BOO!” My hands soared into the air with finesse. Dionysus fell off his side of the bench, legs flying skyward comically Now I was the one laughing. I pounded the table a few times for good measure. And this wasn't even the best part. “Don't you see, Donny? I'm only messing with you. I'm the god of humor, remember? You should have seen the look on your face!” I overflowed again with bursts of contagious giggles. Dionysus was as pale as a ghost. He gave a half-hearted laugh. “Haha. Very funny, Johnny.” His composure had finally returned to him. Not an ounce of drunkenness was left in his system. Peeing his pants in terror may have helped with removing the homebrew. I wiped a tear from my eye and took a deep breath to help settle myself down. Dionysus was now enraged at how easily he had been fooled. “You're going to pay for that, boy!” He turned a shade of red, which then turned to purple, then blue. If he keeps that up, he'll go thermonuclear. “Oh, but Donny, when I said that I was messing with you, I was referring to how I scared the living daylights out of you, not the part about how my power is stronger than yours ten to one easily.” Dionysus didn't hear my words in his fury, “I'm going to turn you into a grape so large, you'll make enough wine for the next eon!” I laughed despite the situation. Some things sound much better in the head before they become a verbal sentence. But I couldn't let Dionysus turn me into the world's largest grape. I had my own plans. This was the best part. I liked to call it my finishing touch. I closed my eyes and opened them a moment later. They had lost their ocean blue. All that was left in the socket was a glowing white with a tinge of gold. A low hum filled the air, like what a high voltage telephone wire sounds like when it rains. I was literally hovering a handbreadth off of my seat. I made sure that my voice was layered with octaves of basses and tenors. “You will forget that I ever existed. The last twenty minutes were eventless.” A vein in Dionysus’s temple bulged, his pupils dilated, then he got up and staggered back to his post by the door like a zombie. My eyes returned to normal, the humming ceased, and I plopped back onto the bench. I picked up my pitcher of hard ambrosia from the picnic table, dropped it into my bottomless pack, and swung the bag over my shoulders. I wonder how long it will be until we meet again, Donny. The light show I displayed wasn't exactly necessary. I didn't need to float in their air, nor did I need to alter my eyes or changed my voice. I could have forced him to my will simply with a mental command. It's something that I like to call “being a god”; we enjoy showing off every once in a while. It's in our nature. I stepped onto the cobblestone path that wound its way up Mt. Olympus. I looked up at the clouds gathered around its peak and the structures that littered its face. “You have arrived at your destination,” I said to myself. That's it for now. Please tell me what you think. What I can improve on, what you enjoyed, stuff like that.
    2. PowerGuy300

      "Dark" writing experiment

      This is about two years worth of writing experience. What do you think? When I regained consciousness, the first sensation I had was not the continual dull throbbing ache, nor the sense of animal-like fear, (which I both felt soon after,) but it was the feeling of a light prick on the back of my neck; the feeling that I was being watched. I know that my gut never lies, whether it’s saying it's telling me not to go down that particular dark alleyway, or it’s hungry. It was also complaining about the lack of food that it was intaking, but that wasn’t a pressing issue at the moment. The only thing I could feel was a lumpy, hard bed which obviously meant I was in a hospital. It was pitch black and I couldn't even see my hand in front of my face. There was a stale scent to the air but it somehow kept the sanitary smell that all medical buildings have simultaneously. But then I felt the prick on my neck again and my attention was torn back to my gut. A chill went down my spine, Why would someone be watching me? It seemed outlandish, but still felt just as creepy and I couldn't shake the feeling no matter how hard I tried to get rid of it. I could hear the quiet hum of a machine behind me, and then the air suddenly felt a little fresher. I realized there had to be IV tubes connected to my lungs. Then I heard it: the faintest sound of someone else’s breath. I froze, still as a sentinel. Cold sweat formed in my brow. My heart started working double time. I tried to place where the sound had come from but without success. Everything was formless in the inky blackness. It was the longest thirty seconds of my life. Then I remembered to breathe again and inhaled as quietly as possible. I dismissed it as my mind playing tricks on me after a couple minutes of dead silence. Nobody could hold their breath for five minutes, anyway. There was hardly a thing I feared, but if there was one thing, it would have to be fear of the unknown. It has been my nemesis for as long as I could remember. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep, but it wouldn't come to me. It must have been an hour later, I opened my eyes without getting any sleep. The faintest hint of light stabbed through a small crack between the blinds of a window. I suddenly sat bolt upright in my bed. There were three figures standing unnaturally still at the foot of my bed. I blinked a couple of times, hoping that I was just seeing things. But I wasn't. I tried to get out of bed when I heard an unsettling voice from the one in the middle, "There is no need to run," it chided, "You can't leave here unless I want you to. Luckily for you," It smiled darkly, his teeth glinting off the low sun, "you won't need to leave here." I was not in the mood for this. Maybe it was a case of the Mondays, even though I had no idea what day it was, "That's great," I said dully, interrupting his would-be rant, "But, I'm going to have to cut you off right there, before you can explain your very elaborate evil plans of killing me and taking over the world." It probably wasn't the brightest of ideas to provoke whoever these people were, but that was an opportunity that was too good to pass up. "Oh we aren't going to kill you, we-" "Have plans for me," I finished, "I know the plot of Mission: Impossible" I somehow managed to stay calm and keep my dry, sarcastic tone of voice. I almost giggled, in spite of myself "Doesn’t he think he’s a smartie." Groaned the one on the left. "So, the question is, who gets to seed the boy?" I made a few gestures trying to weigh the odds that guys were taking some type of crazy pills. I kept the snide remarks coming at a steady pace. I raised my hand and cut the left man off, "Sorry to rain on your parade here, but if you plan on planting seeds in me, I want to let you know that I don't make very good fertilizer; mostly just skin and bones. Also, if you need a tour guide, the psychiatric ward is just down those stairs. I’ll even let you try on some of the straight jackets if you want to." "What is this guy talking about?" The one on the right asked. "I could ask you the same question," I retorted. One of them finally snapped, "Look at me," he said as if talking to a two-year-old, "if you say one more word, I will cut out your tongue and I'll make sure that my seed has a couple of extra drops of ichor on it when it transfers. I had no idea what he just said, but I nodded anyway and closed my mouth. My gut was telling that wasn’t something I wanted to happen. "Wait a minute, here," Left cut in, "I thought it was my turn to seed someone!" He vigorously tapped his chest with his index finger. "No," Middle hissed, "it's not whoever has been stuck here the longest, it's the experience!" "If anyone here has the most skill here, it’s me!” Right yelled over the other two. They began bickering and arguing over who could "seed" me. I couldn't do anything since I was still wired to my bed and if I called for help, I would be dead meat. "Silence!" middle spat, "The sun is coming up and we don't have much time!” A couple of rays of sunlight were peeping through the curtains and when they landed on Thing One Two and Three, it appeared to partially pass through them, as if the light was traveling through muddy water. “I am going to seed him and if anyone else has anything to say about it, I'll almost feel sorry for you as you fall six stories through a window!" He jabbed his thumb at the glass pane. That really shut everyone up. Middle opened his hand and in his palm, pitch black flakes seemed to crawl out of the skin and they began to collect in the center, moving by themselves. The small bunch of black dandruff levitated off of his hand. Left and Right began backing up nervously like they knew something bad was about to happen. The particles began to coalesce into one large mass of nightmare fuel and as it grew in size, a faint purple onyx light could be seen inside of it. The flecks themselves seemed to absorb light, creating their own dark aura. The seed grew in size and brightness until there was a small, sphere of energy hovering above his hand which unsettled me more than seeing their silhouettes in the dark. For the first time, I actually felt a genuine tinge of fear. He began walking toward me wearing a sick grin. The ball crackled with energy and it rolled by itself off his hand and onto the bed cover, trailing ash-like particles. The temperature in the room suddenly dropped ten degrees and the sun seemed to fade entirely. Only a dull grey light encased the room. Eight tiny limbs sprouted from the sphere, giving it a spider-like characteristic. It leaped up into the air and flew headfirst into the sheets, and then sunk straight into them as if they were a liquid. My blood turned cold as I felt a small poke on my back a moment later. The pinprick of discomfort quickly grew into a bonfire of heat stretching across my torso. I don't think that "seed" would properly title the electrifying agony I was in. The area of pain rapidly spread up my back. Then I heard a knock of the door of my hospital room. Nobody made an attempt to answer it except whoever was on the other side. In other words, the door almost flew off its hinges from the force that it was kicked in with and there was a considerable dent left in the center of its metal. The pain seemed to recede for a second, but the trace of heat that had returned to my body was short lived and quickly snuffed out like a candle in a gust of wind. Then, in walked someone who was covered head to toe in a complex set clothes. I could only make out the amber in their eyes. The others noticed this new person who now was automatically deemed a threat. Left and Right turned to face this new enemy. The visitor had no interest in quarreling with them, but instead, chucked a small metallic object into the air and it clanged to the floor. Then, they promptly ran out of the room. "Close your eyes if you care for them!" The person yelled from over their shoulder. I deducted that was a good plan of action so I shut my eyes as tight as possible. If I said that there was a bright flash, that would have been the understatement of the century. My eyelids were useless against the harsh, piercing light, like a knife slicing through warm butter. The majority of the pain suddenly cut out, leaving only a dull ache. After a couple of seconds of complete silence, I cracked my eyes again. The new mysterious figure stood in front of me with three piles of smoldering ash encircling her. She had taken off some of the well worn out garments that covered her face to take a heavy breath of air, "That was close, too close. Good thinking by distracting them with all those crazy comments from the peanut gallery." I blinked, unaware of the fact that I had delayed my fate long enough to escape it. I nodded anyway, acting like I knew that all along. "Now," she said, "let's take a look at that seed of yours." She had me take off my shirt and she inspected the wound on my back. Even though I had no idea who she was I complied without a second thought. There was a spider web of dark purple cracks which were all bound together in the center to form a crater-like gash that was gradually oozing an unidentifiable black liquid. “You got a name?” she asked as she inspected the gash. “Yeah…” I suddenly trailed off. What was my name? “I’m just teasing you,” she chuckled, giving me a light pat “nobody knows their actual name here. I go by Ana, though.” I shuddered, trying to ignore that last statement, "Will I be okay?" She shrugged, "how could I know. I'm not a doctor. Just a low scout." She drew an object from a pack thrown over her shoulder that looked like the combination of a surgical tool and a stereotypical alien blaster. I had no idea what it was other than it looked very unpleasant to use. She pressed a button on the side of the device and a laser blinked on at one end where it pointed off, "Apply this to it once a day and it should keep the seed more or less under control. Use it on the lowest setting for only a few seconds a day. It gets a little… messy… on the higher power levels." I opened my mouth to speak, but Ana raised a finger, signaling for me to be quiet, "We need to leave before more shadows arrive," she whispered, "That was the last spark grenade I had on me so we’ll have to improvise." I noticed a flaw in her plan, "I'm still in the bed and I don't intend to get off life support when I desperately need it." I had no clue why I needed life support, but if I couldn’t even remember my own name, something bad must have occurred to me. She rolled her eyes and jerked the power plug of the life support out of its socket. My heart skipped a beat, then I realized, I was okay and still breathing somehow, which was a big plus in my book. After unhooking the IV’s from myself and removing the adhesive pads, we headed out the door. Ana broke the silence, "Welcome to The Deep," she said. I raised an eyebrow, "The what?" "You know, The Deep Sleep, of course." I'm open to any feedback or criticism
    3. PowerGuy300


    4. PowerGuy300


      I would like to buy a vowel, An "m," please
    5. PowerGuy300

      What song are you listening to?

      natural - Imagine dragons
    6. PowerGuy300

      Post your quotes here.

      "The only thing larger than the universe is the size of the egos of the scientists who think they know the size of the universe." -my father
    7. PowerGuy300

      What song are you listening to?

      Rasputin (how does this help me focus and do my HW?!)
    8. PowerGuy300

      Laugh out loud!

      I put this into r/oldpeoplefacebook and got over 6k upvotes. TY
    9. PowerGuy300

      Best of the 80's

      Have this crazy math teach who religiously listens to his 80's joy soundtrack on Spotify. I have discovered a rock song that makes him start playing the air guitar no matter what he is doing and he does it no matter how many times he hears it. So sometimes I steal the mouse to his computer and make him stop lecturing us
    10. PowerGuy300

      Now Who is This "Frog"?

      Frog if you are looking for any legos, ask Fox. We have accumulated a LARGE amount over the years when the price for sets wasn't 50 cents per brick.
    11. PowerGuy300

      Boys vs. Girls

    12. PowerGuy300

      Favourite books?

      favorite book series': Inheritance cycle, rangers apprentice, H.I.V.E., Earth fall, Percy Jackson series, heroes of Olympus, trials of Apollo, mortality doctrine, a series of unfortunate events, bodyguard, spy school, and Alex rider. I used to read diary of a wimpy kid.
    13. PowerGuy300

      Wattpad Book Suggestions

      what good sci-fi or fantasy would you guys recommend?
    14. PowerGuy300

      League of Legends

      Yay! I got siler! In presason D:<